Two Weddings and a Funeral (1st Wedding)

I have finally experienced the being of a new life as two and the end of a life as one in Uganda. I went to my first Ugandan wedding a month ago in Mbarara. It was a friend’s brother-in-laws wedding, so I attended the Give Away, the Wedding and the Reception, all in very traditional Uganda style.

The Give Away was on a Friday afternoon. It is always in the bride’s home town, so we traveled about 45 minutes away from Mbarara to Ishaka. We were with the groom’s side, so all the family and friends meet up just outside of Ishaka at a small restaurant and traveled to the site of the give away in a caravan of cars. It had rained very heavily that morning and early afternoon so the whole party was delayed. When we arrived on site for the give away all of the family and friends of the groom stood outside of the hall in a long line of couples, all dressed in their traditional Western Uganda give away dresses and suites. It was a parade of colors as we entered the venue, where the bride’s family had been waiting for many hours. The groom’s friends and family were seated for a traditional dinner; cabbage salad, matooke, millet bread, Irish, deep fried cassava, beans, rice, chicken, beef, pork, chapatti, fruit and soda.

After eating we were moved into the main venue for the give away to begin. The bride’s Godfather was the Master of Ceremonies for the evening. He introduced the parents of the bride & groom and welcomed everyone. Soon there were men carrying crates of soda, boxes of washing soap, salt, flour and bags of rice in and laying them at his feet. I was told it was a thank you from the groom’s family. Not long after that traditional music started and the maids and the bride entered into the venue in a slow dance positional. They were dressed in brightly colored yellow and blue traditional dresses. They were ended and sat on mats at one end of the hall by her parents table. Then friends and her mother came up and gave her pearl necklaces (still not sure what that was about). After that the bride started walking around the groom’s side of the hall. I was told she was looking for her potential mate and that this was the Introduction part of the ceremony not the give away yet. She finally found him and took him to her mat with the maids. When that was done they both left the hall and the guest were server sodas and there was entertainment of traditional dances.

About a half hour later the maids and the bride come strolling in again, this time with red, orange and gold traditional dresses on. Ahh finally the give away was to begin. Then the groom and his best man came in and were taken to the mats were the bride and maids were. The bride and groom were joined by the Godfather, told to hold hands, some words were spoken and then everyone cheered! You’d think that was it but no. The groom left and the bride joined her eldest brother at the large table in the center of the room with about 6 cakes on it. They cut a main cake together and then drank from goblets. My friend told me this was a symbol of the family’s last meal with the bride and giving the toast was a blessing to the future marriage. The maids came around with plates with small pieces of cake for the guest to have. Then the speeches started from the brother, the groom’s family, the bride’s family, aunties, brothers, sisters, uncles, friends etc. During the speeches some of the cakes from the table were wrapped and given to family or friends, and there were also thank you baskets and presents given to people that made speeches. This last about 2 more hours. Finally about 10pm the give away was finished. It was time to head home and prepare for tomorrow’s wedding.

The wedding was at the Anglican Cathedral in Mbarara, a beautiful old brick church with amazing stained glass windows. It actually reminded me of my Grandparent’s church in the states. The wedding was supposed to start at noon but it didn’t start till 1pm because the bride and the maids were stuck at the saloon getting their hair done. Anyway, when it did start it was a very beautiful wedding! The bride was beautiful and the flower girl and peg boy (Not a ring bearer because he carries a small broom) were so cute! The Arch Bishop of Kabale even proceeded over the wedding along with the cathedral’s priest, both giving meaningful sermons. After the ceremony and all the pictures were over we headed to the reception.